This post has been a while coming. I have thought about what I wanted to say and wondered how all of my blog readers would feel about reading it, or even if any would read it, after seeing how long it is.
As of late, I would say actually a while, my stitching has been all over the place and it has caused me much mental stress and strife, and I am not really sure why. I have started and stopped and scrapped more projects and spent more money than I care to admit to anyone.
I was gung-ho about the CCN cottages back when they were first announced and then I was obsessed with a HAED, and wasn't going to stitch the cottages, and then the HAED was giving me fits and I thought there is no way I am going to be able to do this, and I started seeing all of the pics on the Cottage SAL and I thought these look so great, I HAVE to do them! And in my craziness I dropped out of the Cottage SAL blog and am now on a waiting list to rejoin. Idiotic, yes, for me to have dropped out!!!!
And I have restarted January cottage about three times now. And then I started LK Fat Snowmen. Both projects on 25 count, tent stitching, mind you, because I wanted to stitch faster, you know, and get something done. But then I got to the snowman on the January cottage and it just looked 50 kinds of wrong.
So, I am restarting, again, on 32 count Sage Jobelan, and stitching them all individually for my scrapbook. And restarting LK Fat Snowmen at some point on the fabric also, 2 over 2, full cross stitches, like I normally do, and going to do them individually for my scrapbook also.
And I look back over my cross stitch "career" and see a lot of trying different stuff, scrapbooking my pieces, finishing them myself, framing, getting them finished by someone else, trying linen, all kinds of threads, different size needles, and it goes on and on and on. But I feel as if I am not getting anywhere. Like I am going in circles. And it is completely maddening. Because I love this hobby. It is the only thing I do for me.
And I read everyone's blogs and everyone seems accomplished and moving forward and not have any of the schizophrenia I feel. Is there anyone out there that feels the same way? Maybe you are just not putting it on your blog. But on some level, by BF and others, I feel judged and it makes me want to shut down and not write on this blog and keep my stitching to myself.
And I think to myself this must be simpler. I am making this WAY too complicated. Just all of it. Like fabric. My favorite all time fabric is Jobelan. It's evenweave, so no slubs like in linen, and it's fairly non-see-through, so I can carry threads if need be. But why do I stitch on linen then?
And scissors. I don't know if any of you have this problem, but it seems as if most of the scissors out there my fingers just do not fit comfortably in those holes, except ONE pair, Kelmscott Tudor Rose scissors. Fabulous ones.
And finding a fabric where WHITE floss shows up well. This has caused quite a conundrum for me in the past. The Sage Jobelan seems to fit that bill, though. We shall see.
So, I am taking a deep breath and having a do-over, and hoping and praying I can move forward and accomplish some finishes.
My goals for February:
1. January Cottage~32 count Sage Jobelan~finish for my scrapbook
2. Lizzie Kate A Little Love kit~32 count Lambswool Jobelan~finish for my scrapbook (the linen that came in this kit is very scratchy and stiff, so I am substituting)
If you have read down this far, thank you. I know this post seems all over the place. I just wanted to get this out. There is a sane stitching person in me just trying to claw its way out!
I also am organizing my threads on bobbins now. Much neater. Thanks to Rachel for causing me to have that lightbulb moment. I don't know why I didn't do this before. My goal is to have a box for each different floss, WDW, GAST, CC, DMC, just like she does.
And if I have not commented on your blog lately, it's not that I am NOT reading. I am. Everyone is doing a completely fabulous job on everything. You all make me laugh, sometimes cry, and I find inspiration and hope every day through all of you.